Tuesday, 9 November 2010

There are some movies you know it just going to drag on for the next hour and a half (more like 3 hours nowadays), some movies you don’t even need to go into the theatre to work out the story and some you love the moment it starts. For me, “The Rebound” was just that, well the last two anyways.

Before I go on any further, this review/opinion piece is going to be completely biased as is everything else you can find here. So, you have been warned.

The movie starts off detailing a daily life of your everyday suburban housewife getting her kids to school, being paranoid about germs (which immediately reminded me of the hilarious Jodie Foster in “Nim’s Island”) and being a sport fanatic (Sandra Bullock in “The Blind Side”). Her life was set off-track (or rather on-track) upon the discovery of her husband getting a blowjob on their son’s 6^th birthday from a footage (presumably taken by said bastard dad) of the festivities (insert quotation marks if you please).

She tend takes off, with her two kids, to New York City (what a fantastic place for kids to grow up, and be ‘educated’ in the ways of life which of course includes changing ethnicities and adding roughly five gazzilion swear words into your yearly word count [clearly, my Maths degree has been paying off]) Stereotyping aside, she moves in to an apartment right above a coffee shop (Can you get a better location! I’m serious here.) and befriends a waiter at the said coffee shop ( played by Justin Bartha, an almost mature looking Adrian Brody-lookalike) who is looking for the meaning to his life after being dumped by his ex-wife just looking for a Green Card.

Well, long story short (because I’m getting bored and I was start saying what I wanna say and not just write a synopsis), divorcee hires coffee-shop waiter as nanny (on joke made my co-worker who wants to MILF the divorcee ), waiter realises he loves being with kids, and this particular mum. Triggered by a visit from the bastard dad, divorcee initiates a relationship with nanny/waiter/Adrian Brody look-a-like, eventually leading to (many cradle-snatchers references) a happy honeymoon period before everything crashed and burnt due to a failed (accidental) pregnancy.

Taking an earlier advise given by her to act his age and travel the world, he finds purpose by educating kids from all around the world, and eventually settling down back in NYC to give kid seminars in museums about people (or at least that’s what I could gather) whom he presumably met on his journeys. She, on the other hand, finally succeeds as a sports news writer and eventually gets the position as anchor. It was at a celebratory lunch with her former manager, where she finally bumps into the guy who reveals that he adopted a *RACIST ALERT*Pakistan/Indian-looking kid and given him a Jewish name. Boy, he’s going to have fun.*RACIST ALERT*. The flames rekindle and they all had lunch together with them holding hands under the table. (And no, that’s not an euphemism for anything. Now who’s not acting their age?)

It’s a wonder how me cutting down the story turns into 2 paragraphs...

Anyways, now that you’ve got the gist of the movie, or not, I would like to write my 2 cents in. (which I’m presuming some kind soul out there is going to be paying me. Any takers? Only 2 cents per word.)

No one? Well, boo-freaking-hoo...

While slightly predictable, the plot gets one so involved with their lives that it’s easy to just let your brain go and enjoy the ride (or maybe that’s just me, throwing my brain out the window in celebration of the completion of my papers). It’s hard not to eventually fall for the subdued, mature romantic in Aram (Yes, that’s the guy’s character name) and his playful side with the kids makes it twice as hard. For me, that is a hallmark of a great romantic comedy. One should be able to walk out of the theatre with at least a slight believe that love is alive and out there (and laugh of course, but I was referring to the romantic bit). I personally really enjoyed watching Justin Bartha’s performance here and it makes me regret that the Hangover did not feature him as much (I’m hoping he gets a better part in the sequel, or maybe I just don’t remember the movie as well). Although, they were probably thinking that another Jewish comedian would be tacky. But hey, that’s a poor reason to waste comedic talent.

Catherine Zeta-Jones plays a rather convincing housewife, until you feel that the mummy haircut and wardrobe still can’t hide her gorgeous face and those honkers enough. Also, it was really out of character when her character suddenly adopted a slight (I can’t pinpoint the accent but I’m going to say ) Hispanic accent during the argument they were in caused by the failed pregnancy. It was like a moment of realisation: “Okay, all of these is not real.” which is a terrible turn-off when watching a movie.

Putting that downer aside, I have to say the movie featured the less pompous side of New York (read Brooklyn, although not really) in a very beautiful way. It was simplistic, but still gritty at the same time. From the weird middle-aged flasher to the beautiful little coffee shop, it’s just hard not to want to move there (well, minus the flasher unless you’re into that.). And the apartment that she was complaing wasn’t all that? I would have loved to have lived there (and not just because of the coffee shop just downstairs and in comparison with the noise hellhole rut that I am living in). The door has a pretty secure lock (always a first when living in New York), the apartment is clean, modern and actually spacious with a kitchen, living room and 2 bedrooms. Of course, someone is going to point out that it is just a set and no apartment above a coffee shop will look that nice, but the set designers must have had drawn inspiration from the real sorta place right? Or are they just too stuck up their asses to think of anything outside their luxurious homes? I’m hoping the former anyways.

All in all, “The Rebound” was a really enjoyable watch for all you rom-com lovers out there. I was surprised that I have not actually heard of the movie until I got it of a friend (and glad that I did) as an ‘okay’ recommendation. (Subdued expectation succeeded.) Although the ending did little in tying up loose ends, I have seen worse and am glad that they at least showed the couple starting to get back together when both are at a much better place in life. I oddly want to watch a sequel in which they start having marital problems and eventually working pass them (or not), but that just me being sadistic. Or maybe that’s just so I could get more pearls of wisdom from Aram’s father! (Who knew that people actually can get surgery for a new asshole? I certainly didn’t.)

So, that’s me, signing off from my first post, in like forever (clearly I need to improve my vocabulary, like now...), I hope you have enjoyed reading the approximate 1300 words I have churned out in the last hour and a half (that’s how long the movie was as well) and I look forward to writing more for you all to read (and hopefully enjoy). Also, I would prefer the payment of £36 in cash, mailed to me, or transferred to my paypal account. Enjoy.

Labels: movie, my life