Saturday, 23 July 2011
Differences of Opinions (Matter)
prologue : What you are about to read was something that I was rather inspired to write about some time ago and did, however events transpired and I never got to finish it off in my inspiration high, much less proofread it, until today. So it may seem a little disjointed, particularly towards the end, but hopefully the take home message is still rather evident.
Differences of opinions.That’s the root of all our arguments. That’s the motivation for every debate ever held worldwide. Segregation of mindsets into pros and cons; against and for; right and wrong. From issues as trivial as which writing instrument to use to matters of national importance such as who’s running the country for the next few years, opinions are plenty, varied and mostly opposing.
That’s the little Catch 22 to us being individuals. Our individuality stops us from all having the same sets of thoughts, preferences and opinions. There may be issues with herd mentality and peer pressure but again, not everyone is pushed to (and choose to follow) the same set of opinions (otherwise, that would just be called brainwashing).
The motivation for me to write this up came from one of my more reliably sources of inspiration; movies. With some free time on my hands, I decided to enjoy one of the movies I have left untouched for a few months now, and randomly I chose to press play on a little known (to me and my circle of friends anyways) called “Down with Love”, a 2003 rom-com starring Renée Zellweger (Bridget Jones) and Ewan McGregor (I can only visualise him as the psycho priest in Angels and Demons), where the female lead writes the titular book about shunning love to be taken seriously in the workplace circa the 60’s (or maybe it was the 50’s). For the full plot, please check wiki or imdb but the point is that both leads have extremely different mindsets and that got the proverbial ball rolling.
However, to say that the movie was my only inspiration would be extremely narrow-minded of me as this is a prominent matter almost everywhere one turns, and even within oneself.
Take for example the protests going on back in my home country, which is just one of the many protests, globally and historically, requesting the dissolution of the current ruling party. A majority of people believe that the parliament has been unfairly stacked with yes men and are protesting for a fair re-election. Yet there are also a group of people who have no such concerns or even believe that to be a ploy of the opposing party to garner attention and votes. I know some of you (or maybe even all of you) will be saying that it is fairly obvious that the government is a sham, and a poorly constructed sham at that (given their often contradictory claims or ”statements”). The facts do not lie, and the case against them is strong, but I would like to point out that I am not discussing who’s right or wrong. Rather, I am trying to highlight the point that either sides of the argument are, in their opinions, correct and that opinion is their constitutional right. Everyone is entitled to their opinions, right or wrong.
One may further argue that if one was to look at the matter objectively, it is clear as day who is in the right. However, objectively, it is also inefficient to have that many governing bodies in the world. Objectively speaking, it would be much more efficient to have a global governmental block, and just get rid of the notions of different nationalities, currencies and even languages. However, in the matter of politics, as it relates greatly to people, subjectivity (and hoodwinking) plays a large part. And that’s why I rarely, if ever, discuss politics. There is simply no clear right or wrong, and whichever side you choose, there are bound to be people who disagree.
But I digress. My intentions were not to push the hot button topic. It just happened to serve as a slightly relevant, current example (because all my examples so far have been terribly dated. I mean, 2003? Who can remember that far back?).
In order to maintain an open mind, let us consider a less serious issue. Say there were 5 jelly beans, obtained from no particular source, to be divided to 3 people. How would the division be made, and who would make the decision? Who will be short-changed? Who stands to gain? Obviously, the decision made would depend on a number of factors. Say the decision was made within the group, it would depend on, amongst others, is there a more generous person in the bunch, who likes jelly beans, who actually can’t have jelly beans (due to allergies say), is there a clear group leader, are the benefits to accepting the smaller share, what is the relationship between the members of the group, are the jelly beans actually still edible? There are plenty more, but I think the point has been made. Rarely is a situation just purely black-and-white. Even for caught criminals, there is still a trial to determine his/her innocence.
However, not all differences of opinions are detrimental to the opposing parties. There are also many times that differences of opinions also serve as a fresh perspective on the topic under discussion. It relies on our willingness to hear them out and see if a middle ground may be achieved for the benefit of the mutual interest. Almost every industry takes this into account. That’s why when a company decides to come up with a new product, it has to go through sessions of brainstorming and consumer testing. In the film industry, the director, the producer and the executive(s) all have input to contribute to the final product, as well as occasionally, a group of test audiences, any or all of which may change the trajectory of the movie plot considerably. On an individual level, we all also practise it one time or another. We have all, at some point, asked for a second opinion on a piece of technology, clothing, style choice or even, partners. Of course, I do not refer to those times where you phrased the question in such a way that the answer you want is in the question itself. At times, when there is no one around, or if one just has no friends, one also tends to debate issues with oneself (like I do, constantly).
This leads to the next point I would like to touch on. Throughout my writings here, I have highlighted time and time again the posts are solely my opinions on various matters. The thing is, even my opinions about myself and my life is ever-changing (creating a potluck of crazed, incoherent ramblings which this lunatic appreciates that some people still read).
Someone once said, “Every five years, I look back at my life and realise what an asshole I have been five years ago” (thank you, happythankyoumoreplease) and that’s just it. Our perceptions and opinions on basically everything, ourselves included, changes (I refrain from using ‘matures’ for certain reasons) as time progresses. I am (pretty) certain that my readers would be able to agree with me on this point. It is just one of those things that we have to deal with. I implore you to momentarily step back into your shoes 5 years in the past and consider the quote I have just mentioned. (Since this is not a two-way communication, I shall just relate my experience instead but don’t cheat! MonkeyJ wants you to think and be a better person, or so the insane monkey wants you to believe.)
Five years ago...
I was in my last year of secondary school. I was stressed about what and where I was going into after finishing school. I was worried about the impact of my lack of participation in “extra-cocurricular” activities. (Boy, was that stupid...) I still had quite a bit of school boy mentality and my temper was short as ever. I was still under the impression that I could draw decently and I did not have a pseudo-stable blog(s). I still spoke regularly to some people (KF, JM), was friends with a lot more, and was liked enough by the others. Yet, I still knew not the majority of my closest friends today. I was also an even bigger naive, pretentious and unreliable little bitch (ignore the horrible construct and focus on the meaning) back then (so it was probably a good thing I didn’t know my current friends then). If I was to be completely honest, looking back at myself then, I can’t say I was proud of who I was. (And trust me, that wasn’t where I planned to go with this when I started this paragraph.) I can’t help but think of how petty I was about so many issues and how horribly I treated my family, my friends and in general, everyone....
Before I derail into the abyss of self-hate, let’s get back on topic, shall we?
As I was saying earlier, an individual’s opinions aren’t set in stone. There will always be changes, regardless of how strong we felt about an issue. I, as always, am the harbourer of examples. At a not so recent past, I strongly believed that I was a “free-flow thinking (i.e. hippie-like) liberal psychologist to be”, poised to tackle the world’s psyche but look at me now. I am almost finishing my degree (highscoring constantly on the way as well as I’m sure is a fact any reader of this blog is well aware of) in perhaps what many consider to be one of the most rigid, empirical courses. In the past, I always thought I will never travel down here (due to the many, many people who seem to think this place is god sent without actually knowing squat about it) but rather I envisioned myself west. However, I have been here for three years and I have grown quite fond of the place (sans the idiotic foreigners, myself NOT included obviously). I used to have the most peculiar belief system based almost entirely on self-made superstitions which I now often look back and laugh at (but still, never direct the base of your feet to my direction! It’s still gross, not to mention, unlucky.), or maybe not...
The point is, before I start over-contradicting myself (again), taking even just one individual into account, it’s almost impossible to assume or predict what he or she thinks. Now, if we were to extrapolate that to a population, the job of a representative of a group might as well be to predict when the aliens would drop by to massacre us, plus the winning numbers of next week’s lottery.
However, there are also times (let’s hope for humanity that these are rare and far in between) when a person’s right to their opinions might as well be mute by the way the person handles themselves but it is always good to have at least one encounter with such a person so we know we are relatively alright. I certainly have.
And, that’s just my opinion.
Differences of opinions.That’s the root of all our arguments. That’s the motivation for every debate ever held worldwide. Segregation of mindsets into pros and cons; against and for; right and wrong. From issues as trivial as which writing instrument to use to matters of national importance such as who’s running the country for the next few years, opinions are plenty, varied and mostly opposing.
That’s the little Catch 22 to us being individuals. Our individuality stops us from all having the same sets of thoughts, preferences and opinions. There may be issues with herd mentality and peer pressure but again, not everyone is pushed to (and choose to follow) the same set of opinions (otherwise, that would just be called brainwashing).
The motivation for me to write this up came from one of my more reliably sources of inspiration; movies. With some free time on my hands, I decided to enjoy one of the movies I have left untouched for a few months now, and randomly I chose to press play on a little known (to me and my circle of friends anyways) called “Down with Love”, a 2003 rom-com starring Renée Zellweger (Bridget Jones) and Ewan McGregor (I can only visualise him as the psycho priest in Angels and Demons), where the female lead writes the titular book about shunning love to be taken seriously in the workplace circa the 60’s (or maybe it was the 50’s). For the full plot, please check wiki or imdb but the point is that both leads have extremely different mindsets and that got the proverbial ball rolling.
However, to say that the movie was my only inspiration would be extremely narrow-minded of me as this is a prominent matter almost everywhere one turns, and even within oneself.
Take for example the protests going on back in my home country, which is just one of the many protests, globally and historically, requesting the dissolution of the current ruling party. A majority of people believe that the parliament has been unfairly stacked with yes men and are protesting for a fair re-election. Yet there are also a group of people who have no such concerns or even believe that to be a ploy of the opposing party to garner attention and votes. I know some of you (or maybe even all of you) will be saying that it is fairly obvious that the government is a sham, and a poorly constructed sham at that (given their often contradictory claims or ”statements”). The facts do not lie, and the case against them is strong, but I would like to point out that I am not discussing who’s right or wrong. Rather, I am trying to highlight the point that either sides of the argument are, in their opinions, correct and that opinion is their constitutional right. Everyone is entitled to their opinions, right or wrong.
One may further argue that if one was to look at the matter objectively, it is clear as day who is in the right. However, objectively, it is also inefficient to have that many governing bodies in the world. Objectively speaking, it would be much more efficient to have a global governmental block, and just get rid of the notions of different nationalities, currencies and even languages. However, in the matter of politics, as it relates greatly to people, subjectivity (and hoodwinking) plays a large part. And that’s why I rarely, if ever, discuss politics. There is simply no clear right or wrong, and whichever side you choose, there are bound to be people who disagree.
But I digress. My intentions were not to push the hot button topic. It just happened to serve as a slightly relevant, current example (because all my examples so far have been terribly dated. I mean, 2003? Who can remember that far back?).
In order to maintain an open mind, let us consider a less serious issue. Say there were 5 jelly beans, obtained from no particular source, to be divided to 3 people. How would the division be made, and who would make the decision? Who will be short-changed? Who stands to gain? Obviously, the decision made would depend on a number of factors. Say the decision was made within the group, it would depend on, amongst others, is there a more generous person in the bunch, who likes jelly beans, who actually can’t have jelly beans (due to allergies say), is there a clear group leader, are the benefits to accepting the smaller share, what is the relationship between the members of the group, are the jelly beans actually still edible? There are plenty more, but I think the point has been made. Rarely is a situation just purely black-and-white. Even for caught criminals, there is still a trial to determine his/her innocence.
However, not all differences of opinions are detrimental to the opposing parties. There are also many times that differences of opinions also serve as a fresh perspective on the topic under discussion. It relies on our willingness to hear them out and see if a middle ground may be achieved for the benefit of the mutual interest. Almost every industry takes this into account. That’s why when a company decides to come up with a new product, it has to go through sessions of brainstorming and consumer testing. In the film industry, the director, the producer and the executive(s) all have input to contribute to the final product, as well as occasionally, a group of test audiences, any or all of which may change the trajectory of the movie plot considerably. On an individual level, we all also practise it one time or another. We have all, at some point, asked for a second opinion on a piece of technology, clothing, style choice or even, partners. Of course, I do not refer to those times where you phrased the question in such a way that the answer you want is in the question itself. At times, when there is no one around, or if one just has no friends, one also tends to debate issues with oneself (like I do, constantly).
This leads to the next point I would like to touch on. Throughout my writings here, I have highlighted time and time again the posts are solely my opinions on various matters. The thing is, even my opinions about myself and my life is ever-changing (creating a potluck of crazed, incoherent ramblings which this lunatic appreciates that some people still read).
Someone once said, “Every five years, I look back at my life and realise what an asshole I have been five years ago” (thank you, happythankyoumoreplease) and that’s just it. Our perceptions and opinions on basically everything, ourselves included, changes (I refrain from using ‘matures’ for certain reasons) as time progresses. I am (pretty) certain that my readers would be able to agree with me on this point. It is just one of those things that we have to deal with. I implore you to momentarily step back into your shoes 5 years in the past and consider the quote I have just mentioned. (Since this is not a two-way communication, I shall just relate my experience instead but don’t cheat! MonkeyJ wants you to think and be a better person, or so the insane monkey wants you to believe.)
Five years ago...
I was in my last year of secondary school. I was stressed about what and where I was going into after finishing school. I was worried about the impact of my lack of participation in “extra-cocurricular” activities. (Boy, was that stupid...) I still had quite a bit of school boy mentality and my temper was short as ever. I was still under the impression that I could draw decently and I did not have a pseudo-stable blog(s). I still spoke regularly to some people (KF, JM), was friends with a lot more, and was liked enough by the others. Yet, I still knew not the majority of my closest friends today. I was also an even bigger naive, pretentious and unreliable little bitch (ignore the horrible construct and focus on the meaning) back then (so it was probably a good thing I didn’t know my current friends then). If I was to be completely honest, looking back at myself then, I can’t say I was proud of who I was. (And trust me, that wasn’t where I planned to go with this when I started this paragraph.) I can’t help but think of how petty I was about so many issues and how horribly I treated my family, my friends and in general, everyone....
Before I derail into the abyss of self-hate, let’s get back on topic, shall we?
As I was saying earlier, an individual’s opinions aren’t set in stone. There will always be changes, regardless of how strong we felt about an issue. I, as always, am the harbourer of examples. At a not so recent past, I strongly believed that I was a “free-flow thinking (i.e. hippie-like) liberal psychologist to be”, poised to tackle the world’s psyche but look at me now. I am almost finishing my degree (highscoring constantly on the way as well as I’m sure is a fact any reader of this blog is well aware of) in perhaps what many consider to be one of the most rigid, empirical courses. In the past, I always thought I will never travel down here (due to the many, many people who seem to think this place is god sent without actually knowing squat about it) but rather I envisioned myself west. However, I have been here for three years and I have grown quite fond of the place (sans the idiotic foreigners, myself NOT included obviously). I used to have the most peculiar belief system based almost entirely on self-made superstitions which I now often look back and laugh at (but still, never direct the base of your feet to my direction! It’s still gross, not to mention, unlucky.), or maybe not...
The point is, before I start over-contradicting myself (again), taking even just one individual into account, it’s almost impossible to assume or predict what he or she thinks. Now, if we were to extrapolate that to a population, the job of a representative of a group might as well be to predict when the aliens would drop by to massacre us, plus the winning numbers of next week’s lottery.
However, there are also times (let’s hope for humanity that these are rare and far in between) when a person’s right to their opinions might as well be mute by the way the person handles themselves but it is always good to have at least one encounter with such a person so we know we are relatively alright. I certainly have.
And, that’s just my opinion.
Monkey J
18:31
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18:31
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